Creature of the Day: Western Skink (December 21, 2017)
Charter cult member subscriber D.R. from Wailuku, Maui recently scolded me for the neglecting non-avian life forms in Creature of the Day postings. Although D.R.’s CCI (Creature Credibility Index) is rather weak (jeez, he flunked Zoology in 1967 during his pre-med days at Berkeley) we must reluctantly admit, with humbling chagrin, that he’s right as usual. Damn. Today’s photo is drawn from the CotD archives, a 2012 shoot at Azalea Hill near Fairfax, CA. It’s a Western Skink, a spectacular little lizard that’s quite common in Northern California but rarely seen – unless you’re turning over rocks early in the morning during springtime. Juvenile Western Skinks have spectacular neon blue tails. Wow.
And now it’s time for ART TALK, a Creature of the Day FREE BONUS FEATURE
We return to the topic of ART and PILED STICKS, which we discussed in our THANKSGIVING posting.
During the summer of 1967, I worked at an archetypical and generally wonderful summer camp near Cle Elum, Washington. The Bar 41 Ranch had everything: horses, tolerable food in bulk quantities, an undermaintained murky pool with live tadpoles and maybe a water moccasin -- according to camp legend, steamy summer romances across a wide spectrum of appropriateness, and even one of those big steel triangles hanging from a tree for calling everyone to dinner. There was a feeling of authenticity that accrued from the local wrangling staff who wore non-ironic big belt buckles, cowboy hats and shit-covered boots. For most of that summer, I was the lifeguard at the nearby Cle Elem river, a small tributary of the great Columbia River. It was an easy job; I just positioned myself in thigh-deep water downstream of the capably-swimming, poorly-swimming, or non-swimming campers and grabbed anyone who was delivered into my waiting hands by the rather swift current. Easy! For one week -- due to an absence of the regular counselor – I became the CAMPCRAFT instructor. One day I taught eager 10-year-old kids how to build a camp fire. After my fascinating and detailed explanation of the “fuel ladder” and a demonstration of proper technique resulting in a beautiful marshmallow-ready camp fire, each kid was sent off into the surrounding woods to gather the proper materials for his/her own fire. It was the 5th year of a profoundly catastrophic drought east of the Cascades, so any random pile of dirt would burst into flame with barely a need for an ignition source. AND SO my brilliant campers were all successful fire builders. Their PILES OF STICKS were works of ART as POWERFUL and COGENT as any in the New Museum in New York City.
THOUGHT for the DAY: There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German dramatist, novelist, poet, & scientist (1749 - 1832)
HAPPY SOLSTICE
Best regards,
Dave
And now it’s time for ART TALK, a Creature of the Day FREE BONUS FEATURE
We return to the topic of ART and PILED STICKS, which we discussed in our THANKSGIVING posting.
During the summer of 1967, I worked at an archetypical and generally wonderful summer camp near Cle Elum, Washington. The Bar 41 Ranch had everything: horses, tolerable food in bulk quantities, an undermaintained murky pool with live tadpoles and maybe a water moccasin -- according to camp legend, steamy summer romances across a wide spectrum of appropriateness, and even one of those big steel triangles hanging from a tree for calling everyone to dinner. There was a feeling of authenticity that accrued from the local wrangling staff who wore non-ironic big belt buckles, cowboy hats and shit-covered boots. For most of that summer, I was the lifeguard at the nearby Cle Elem river, a small tributary of the great Columbia River. It was an easy job; I just positioned myself in thigh-deep water downstream of the capably-swimming, poorly-swimming, or non-swimming campers and grabbed anyone who was delivered into my waiting hands by the rather swift current. Easy! For one week -- due to an absence of the regular counselor – I became the CAMPCRAFT instructor. One day I taught eager 10-year-old kids how to build a camp fire. After my fascinating and detailed explanation of the “fuel ladder” and a demonstration of proper technique resulting in a beautiful marshmallow-ready camp fire, each kid was sent off into the surrounding woods to gather the proper materials for his/her own fire. It was the 5th year of a profoundly catastrophic drought east of the Cascades, so any random pile of dirt would burst into flame with barely a need for an ignition source. AND SO my brilliant campers were all successful fire builders. Their PILES OF STICKS were works of ART as POWERFUL and COGENT as any in the New Museum in New York City.
THOUGHT for the DAY: There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German dramatist, novelist, poet, & scientist (1749 - 1832)
HAPPY SOLSTICE
Best regards,
Dave
Creature of the Day: Turkey Vulture, etc. (November 23, 2017)
HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Some of our dear readers expected Creature of the Day to feature a TURKEY today, but our commitment to unpredictability always rules. However, I’m including a Wild Turkey photo for comparison to the vulture. The Turkey Vulture gets its common name from the resemblance of its unfeathered head and dark plumage to that of a Wild Turkey.
I encountered this charming Turkey Vulture along Drakes Beach Road yesterday morning. She was perched on a fence post with her wings spread, catching the heat of the rising sun on her back. I quietly stopped the car and grabbed my camera, which was belted securely into the passenger seat next to me. Question? (thanks for asking) Yes, of course I put a seatbelt on my camera, and furthermore my camera is heavy enough to arm the passenger seat airbags. Duh.
It took some stealthy creeping to get close to this impressive bird, but she tolerated my slow approach to within about 15 feet. Isn’t she a sight? OK, maybe “beautiful” is the wrong word, but “impressive” or perhaps “formidable” work well. In spite of the disrespect often directed at “ugly” Turkey Vultures, they are vital and efficient carrion feeders, superb high-flyers, and reproductive superstars. AND did you know that Turkey Vultures are federally protected by the Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918? …just like the pretty birds. PLEASE NOTE: I’ve included a picture of a pretty bird (no bald head) for those of you who need it. I took the photo yesterday morning.
And now it’s time for ART TALK, a Creature of the Day FREE BONUS FEATURE
Sometimes I visit art museums and galleries. Observing and absorbing a piece, I might be amazed, amused, baffled, irritated, inspired, depressed, annoyed, impressed, surprised, titillated, entertained, nauseated, confused, aroused, repelled, illuminated, insulted, underwhelmed, stimulated, or bored. Perhaps one definition of “art” is that experiencing it can move you from one of these states to another. But let’s be cautious, because by that definition, the smell of a skunk is “art”, as long as it’s been professionally curated.
Please note that I took two art history classes at UC Berkeley in ‘68 or ‘69. I’m believe that I’m as well qualified as anyone to define what art is. Apparently. A week ago I visited the New Museum in New York. It’s a museum of CONTEMPORARY art. I explored the galleries on all 5 floors. The artwork displayed at the New Museum is quite GENDER-y and often… opaque. There are paintings, prints, sculptures, photographs, and several jittery, out-of-focus rapid-cut videos with loud soundtracks of irritating noises -- written, produced, and directed by “young New York artists”.
One piece was a pile of leafless sticks arranged in the corner of a 10x10 white-walled gallery. The lighting was excellent. Some of the sticks had little gold labels on them. The labels were inscribed with cryptic scribbles. A 500-word curatorial essay pasted on the wall explained that the pile of sticks was a POWERFUL and COGENT commentary about polyamory. Other pieces “explored” 1) the folly of tar sand extraction in Alberta, 2) the reckless over prescription and inevitable looming failure of antibiotics, and 3) the shameful failure of the British Monarchy to acknowledge that the Windsors (an invented name that sounded better than “House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha” to English ears) are fundamentally a German family going back several generations and not even slightly British. After carefully studying the pile of sticks up close and from several steps back, I’m pretty sure my attitudes about polyamory hadn’t changed too much.
Best regards,
Dave
I encountered this charming Turkey Vulture along Drakes Beach Road yesterday morning. She was perched on a fence post with her wings spread, catching the heat of the rising sun on her back. I quietly stopped the car and grabbed my camera, which was belted securely into the passenger seat next to me. Question? (thanks for asking) Yes, of course I put a seatbelt on my camera, and furthermore my camera is heavy enough to arm the passenger seat airbags. Duh.
It took some stealthy creeping to get close to this impressive bird, but she tolerated my slow approach to within about 15 feet. Isn’t she a sight? OK, maybe “beautiful” is the wrong word, but “impressive” or perhaps “formidable” work well. In spite of the disrespect often directed at “ugly” Turkey Vultures, they are vital and efficient carrion feeders, superb high-flyers, and reproductive superstars. AND did you know that Turkey Vultures are federally protected by the Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918? …just like the pretty birds. PLEASE NOTE: I’ve included a picture of a pretty bird (no bald head) for those of you who need it. I took the photo yesterday morning.
And now it’s time for ART TALK, a Creature of the Day FREE BONUS FEATURE
Sometimes I visit art museums and galleries. Observing and absorbing a piece, I might be amazed, amused, baffled, irritated, inspired, depressed, annoyed, impressed, surprised, titillated, entertained, nauseated, confused, aroused, repelled, illuminated, insulted, underwhelmed, stimulated, or bored. Perhaps one definition of “art” is that experiencing it can move you from one of these states to another. But let’s be cautious, because by that definition, the smell of a skunk is “art”, as long as it’s been professionally curated.
Please note that I took two art history classes at UC Berkeley in ‘68 or ‘69. I’m believe that I’m as well qualified as anyone to define what art is. Apparently. A week ago I visited the New Museum in New York. It’s a museum of CONTEMPORARY art. I explored the galleries on all 5 floors. The artwork displayed at the New Museum is quite GENDER-y and often… opaque. There are paintings, prints, sculptures, photographs, and several jittery, out-of-focus rapid-cut videos with loud soundtracks of irritating noises -- written, produced, and directed by “young New York artists”.
One piece was a pile of leafless sticks arranged in the corner of a 10x10 white-walled gallery. The lighting was excellent. Some of the sticks had little gold labels on them. The labels were inscribed with cryptic scribbles. A 500-word curatorial essay pasted on the wall explained that the pile of sticks was a POWERFUL and COGENT commentary about polyamory. Other pieces “explored” 1) the folly of tar sand extraction in Alberta, 2) the reckless over prescription and inevitable looming failure of antibiotics, and 3) the shameful failure of the British Monarchy to acknowledge that the Windsors (an invented name that sounded better than “House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha” to English ears) are fundamentally a German family going back several generations and not even slightly British. After carefully studying the pile of sticks up close and from several steps back, I’m pretty sure my attitudes about polyamory hadn’t changed too much.
Best regards,
Dave
Creature of the Day: Western Gull (October 16, 2017)
I was excited about the portrait session. For the first time, I’d be shooting a studio portrait of an untamed wild animal. Although typically photographed as “wildlife”, this obnoxious and unusually vain Western Gull demanded the look of classic 20th Century portrait techniques made famous by Irving Penn, Richard Avedon, Philippe Halsman, and a few other legends.
I contemplated several approaches to the shoot and settled on an orthogonal profile with a hot key light coming into the shot horizontally from the left. Considering the odd personal characteristics of this radically creative but often reviled kleptoparasitic gull, I drew inspiration from one of the greatest portrait photographers of the 20th century, Yousuf Karsh. Although Karsh rarely shot profile views, he did so occasionally when the facial structure of his subject seemed to insist on it.
With a commitment to superior production values, I personally constructed a realistic set in my studio, designed to resemble sand on a Point Reyes beach.
My client arrived with an entourage including a feather stylist, a nutritionist, a publicist, a bill-polisher, a road manager, a caterer, a necromancer, a martial arts sensei, and a personal assistant. We discussed the goals and objectives of the shoot. I showed him the 1954 Karsh photo of the French poet, dramatist, and diplomat Paul Claudel: http://karsh.org/overview/portraits/#22
Yes! He agreed that the Karsh/Paul Claudel photo was an excellent “inspiration” (i.e., an idea worth stealing) for the shoot, but that a wider aspect ratio of 16:9, allowing for more “beach” was necessary and vital to the comprehensibility of the portrait.
OK, I lied. I didn’t shoot the photo in my studio. Rarely, I just show up with a camera and a CREATURE is waiting for me with perfect light on a perfect set. Sunday morning at sunrise, when I arrived at deserted North Beach and found this fine Western Gull waiting for me, he posed extravagantly and I shot. Once. CLICK. This was the first and best of over 640 frames I shot that day.
Photo #2 shows a small wave at the same beach.
Photo #3 shows a Peregrine Falcon, the fastest creature in the world. When it dives on prey in a body position known as a “stoop”, Peregrine Falcons can reach speeds well over 230 mph. This is the first time I’ve captured a half-decent image of one in flight. I shot the photo near Chimney Rock later the same day. DID YOU KNOW that falcons are more closely related to parrots and songbirds than they are to hawks and eagles?
SUBSCRIBERS! I do understand your concerns regarding the UNSUBSCRIBE process. You are not the first to have persistent and recurring nightmares about the EXIT INTERVIEW. (see "UNSUBSCRIBE" below) Some UNSUBSCRIBERS have found a small measure of comfort at CUSSN chapters (CREATURE Unsubscribe Survivors Support Network).
PARTY NOTICE! I have two composite pieces in a juried group show, Greyscale Wonderland, at the bG Gallery in Santa Monica that runs from January 20th until February 4th, 2018. The OPENING RECEPTION will be on January 20th from 5:00 to 8:00 PM at 2525 Michigan Ave, Santa Monica CA 90404. You are invited!
All my best,
Dave
SUBSCRIBE: If you received a filthy, wretched, worn-out, dog-eared, wine-or-THC-stained forwarded copy of Creature of the Day from your Personal Assistant, literary agent, stylist, chiropractor, sadhu, bonbonniere, parole officer, or perhaps a paramedic – you may prefer your own, SEALED, SANITIZED, PRISTINE copy for yourself. Just send an email to dave@dscomposition.com with “COTD subscribe” in the subject line. We will CHEERFULLY welcome you into our WORLDWIDE CotD SUBSCRIBER COMMUNITY, subject to EXTREME VETTING.
UNSUBSCRIBE: If you no longer wish to receive the SPECTACULAR PHOTOGRAPHY, PITHY COMMENTARY, INCISIVE ANALYSIS, and KEEN INSIGHTS jam-packed into every issue of CotD, please send your 1000-word Cancellation Request Essay, last 10 years of federal tax returns, high school, college, and especially Sunday School transcripts, 3 “Letters of Concurrence” from Nobel Laureates, certified copy of your non-fake birth certificate, recent credit report, along with $1000 cash to the address below. We will then contact you to schedule your EXIT INTERVIEW.
I contemplated several approaches to the shoot and settled on an orthogonal profile with a hot key light coming into the shot horizontally from the left. Considering the odd personal characteristics of this radically creative but often reviled kleptoparasitic gull, I drew inspiration from one of the greatest portrait photographers of the 20th century, Yousuf Karsh. Although Karsh rarely shot profile views, he did so occasionally when the facial structure of his subject seemed to insist on it.
With a commitment to superior production values, I personally constructed a realistic set in my studio, designed to resemble sand on a Point Reyes beach.
My client arrived with an entourage including a feather stylist, a nutritionist, a publicist, a bill-polisher, a road manager, a caterer, a necromancer, a martial arts sensei, and a personal assistant. We discussed the goals and objectives of the shoot. I showed him the 1954 Karsh photo of the French poet, dramatist, and diplomat Paul Claudel: http://karsh.org/overview/portraits/#22
Yes! He agreed that the Karsh/Paul Claudel photo was an excellent “inspiration” (i.e., an idea worth stealing) for the shoot, but that a wider aspect ratio of 16:9, allowing for more “beach” was necessary and vital to the comprehensibility of the portrait.
OK, I lied. I didn’t shoot the photo in my studio. Rarely, I just show up with a camera and a CREATURE is waiting for me with perfect light on a perfect set. Sunday morning at sunrise, when I arrived at deserted North Beach and found this fine Western Gull waiting for me, he posed extravagantly and I shot. Once. CLICK. This was the first and best of over 640 frames I shot that day.
Photo #2 shows a small wave at the same beach.
Photo #3 shows a Peregrine Falcon, the fastest creature in the world. When it dives on prey in a body position known as a “stoop”, Peregrine Falcons can reach speeds well over 230 mph. This is the first time I’ve captured a half-decent image of one in flight. I shot the photo near Chimney Rock later the same day. DID YOU KNOW that falcons are more closely related to parrots and songbirds than they are to hawks and eagles?
SUBSCRIBERS! I do understand your concerns regarding the UNSUBSCRIBE process. You are not the first to have persistent and recurring nightmares about the EXIT INTERVIEW. (see "UNSUBSCRIBE" below) Some UNSUBSCRIBERS have found a small measure of comfort at CUSSN chapters (CREATURE Unsubscribe Survivors Support Network).
PARTY NOTICE! I have two composite pieces in a juried group show, Greyscale Wonderland, at the bG Gallery in Santa Monica that runs from January 20th until February 4th, 2018. The OPENING RECEPTION will be on January 20th from 5:00 to 8:00 PM at 2525 Michigan Ave, Santa Monica CA 90404. You are invited!
All my best,
Dave
SUBSCRIBE: If you received a filthy, wretched, worn-out, dog-eared, wine-or-THC-stained forwarded copy of Creature of the Day from your Personal Assistant, literary agent, stylist, chiropractor, sadhu, bonbonniere, parole officer, or perhaps a paramedic – you may prefer your own, SEALED, SANITIZED, PRISTINE copy for yourself. Just send an email to dave@dscomposition.com with “COTD subscribe” in the subject line. We will CHEERFULLY welcome you into our WORLDWIDE CotD SUBSCRIBER COMMUNITY, subject to EXTREME VETTING.
UNSUBSCRIBE: If you no longer wish to receive the SPECTACULAR PHOTOGRAPHY, PITHY COMMENTARY, INCISIVE ANALYSIS, and KEEN INSIGHTS jam-packed into every issue of CotD, please send your 1000-word Cancellation Request Essay, last 10 years of federal tax returns, high school, college, and especially Sunday School transcripts, 3 “Letters of Concurrence” from Nobel Laureates, certified copy of your non-fake birth certificate, recent credit report, along with $1000 cash to the address below. We will then contact you to schedule your EXIT INTERVIEW.
UnCreature of the Day: Total Eclipse of the Sun (August 21, 2017)
IT’S AWESOME!
The last time I ordered a turkey burger (with avocado), my twenty-something, amiable, pretty, extravagantly tattooed server, named Sylvia offered the following perfectly audible editorial comment as she wrote “TB+A” on her order pad: “Awesome”
Earlier today, I saw a TOTAL ECLIPSE of the SUN for the first (and maybe the last) time in my life. It was a spectacular cloudless day alongside the swiftly running Payette River in rural Idaho, about 35 miles north of Boise. Along with about a dozen other friendly gazers wearing very dark and rather goofy sun glasses, parked on the same roadside turnout for the same reason, looking up we saw the disk of the sun slowly occluded by the dark moon in a process that took about an hour and a half to reach “totality”. And when it did, it was, absolutely: “Awesome”
It’s the same word, but somehow the perfect alignment of sun, moon, earth, me, and the axis of my lens – a rarely experienced and superb bucket list phenomenon evoked awe even more indelibly in me than that excellent artisanal turkey burger did.
AND FURTHERMORE, LOOK CLOSELY, the spots on the sun in the second photo are sunspots(1), not bits of dirt on my camera’s sensor(2).
Cheers,
Dave
Photos and text © 2017 Dave Strauss
FOOTNOTES:
Cheers,
Dave
The last time I ordered a turkey burger (with avocado), my twenty-something, amiable, pretty, extravagantly tattooed server, named Sylvia offered the following perfectly audible editorial comment as she wrote “TB+A” on her order pad: “Awesome”
Earlier today, I saw a TOTAL ECLIPSE of the SUN for the first (and maybe the last) time in my life. It was a spectacular cloudless day alongside the swiftly running Payette River in rural Idaho, about 35 miles north of Boise. Along with about a dozen other friendly gazers wearing very dark and rather goofy sun glasses, parked on the same roadside turnout for the same reason, looking up we saw the disk of the sun slowly occluded by the dark moon in a process that took about an hour and a half to reach “totality”. And when it did, it was, absolutely: “Awesome”
It’s the same word, but somehow the perfect alignment of sun, moon, earth, me, and the axis of my lens – a rarely experienced and superb bucket list phenomenon evoked awe even more indelibly in me than that excellent artisanal turkey burger did.
AND FURTHERMORE, LOOK CLOSELY, the spots on the sun in the second photo are sunspots(1), not bits of dirt on my camera’s sensor(2).
Cheers,
Dave
Photos and text © 2017 Dave Strauss
FOOTNOTES:
- “Sunspots are regions of intense magnetic activity which appear dark and are “cooler” or less hot than other areas on the surface of the sun. Sometimes they grow several times the size of Earth’s diameter.” (sunspot definition: © 2017 EarthSky Communications Inc. )
- I don’t normally talk about camera equipment, but because this eclipse was probably one of the most photographed events ever, I’ll make an exception. The attached photos were shot with my Canon 5D3 and 600mm lens, on a tripod of course. The corona photo is a “cool” eclipse photo, meaning that no special filter is needed because the disc of the sun is completely covered by the moon. The partial eclipse photo is a “hot” eclipse photo which can only be shot with a special sun filter that reduces the light entering the camera by about 16-17 stops. That’s a lot of filter! Without the sun filter, the probability of severe damage to human eyes and cameras is extremely high, if not certain.
Cheers,
Dave
Creature of the Day: West Marin Surfer (August 5, 2017)
Early yesterday morning I drove out to Limantour Beach. The sky was grey, but interesting. Complex cloud layers decorated the sky, so it wasn’t the dull grey of a typical overcast.
KQED radio starts to deteriorate in west Marin, but I heard reports of a few thunderstorms as I drove toward the beach, turning the wipers on for a two or three swipes and then off again. Pause. Repeat.
I didn’t see a single car along the 8-mile drive from the turnoff at Bear Valley Road. It’s not unusual to find the Limantour parking lot empty on a weekday at 7:30 AM, but today one old pickup truck had arrived before me. (Damn. I traditionally curse when I’m not the first to arrive at any trailhead, because the first guy down the trail has the best chance of seeing the mostly nocturnal bobcats, coyotes, and other cherished photographic target creatures. The second guy down the trail often just finds the first guy. Sure – if we encounter each other, we exchange pleasantries anyway.)
I assembled my camera + big lens + tripod and headed for the beach with the tripoded camera on my shoulder. I stopped at the crest on the dunes to survey the spectacular expanse of Limantour Beach, north and south. Several fully-rigged fishing boats were working off shore. A few Brown Pelicans were flying in tight formation northbound, millimeters above the water. And nobody was on the beach. EXCEPT: One surfer in a black wetsuit was belly down on his board, paddling through the surf line.
I set my tripod and started shooting pictures of the surfer. Brah, it was totally bitchin, even primo. I was radically stoked. I saw the lip of a gnarly bomb totally axe the dude. Cowabunga.
After about 30-40 minutes of shooting, I noticed a young woman stretched out on a blanket about 100 yards up the beach. I approached and greeted the pretty twenty-something, and asked “Is that your friend out there?”, and she nodded. I gave her my card and said “I think I have a few nice photos of him. Send me your email address, and I show you what I have”. She smiled warmly and said thanks.
I have not heard from them.
Happy Midsummer,
Dave
KQED radio starts to deteriorate in west Marin, but I heard reports of a few thunderstorms as I drove toward the beach, turning the wipers on for a two or three swipes and then off again. Pause. Repeat.
I didn’t see a single car along the 8-mile drive from the turnoff at Bear Valley Road. It’s not unusual to find the Limantour parking lot empty on a weekday at 7:30 AM, but today one old pickup truck had arrived before me. (Damn. I traditionally curse when I’m not the first to arrive at any trailhead, because the first guy down the trail has the best chance of seeing the mostly nocturnal bobcats, coyotes, and other cherished photographic target creatures. The second guy down the trail often just finds the first guy. Sure – if we encounter each other, we exchange pleasantries anyway.)
I assembled my camera + big lens + tripod and headed for the beach with the tripoded camera on my shoulder. I stopped at the crest on the dunes to survey the spectacular expanse of Limantour Beach, north and south. Several fully-rigged fishing boats were working off shore. A few Brown Pelicans were flying in tight formation northbound, millimeters above the water. And nobody was on the beach. EXCEPT: One surfer in a black wetsuit was belly down on his board, paddling through the surf line.
I set my tripod and started shooting pictures of the surfer. Brah, it was totally bitchin, even primo. I was radically stoked. I saw the lip of a gnarly bomb totally axe the dude. Cowabunga.
After about 30-40 minutes of shooting, I noticed a young woman stretched out on a blanket about 100 yards up the beach. I approached and greeted the pretty twenty-something, and asked “Is that your friend out there?”, and she nodded. I gave her my card and said “I think I have a few nice photos of him. Send me your email address, and I show you what I have”. She smiled warmly and said thanks.
I have not heard from them.
Happy Midsummer,
Dave
Creature of the Day: Black-crowned Night Heron (July 8, 2017)
BIRD RESCUE
This morning I had the opportunity to closely observe the release of several rehabilitated birds by very nice and extremely knowledgeable people from BRC, the Bird Rescue Center of Sonoma County. (https://www.birdrescuecenter.org/ ) The release took place at the edge of a quiet pond adjacent to a wastewater treatment plant near Sebastopol.
Today’s release included Great Egrets, Snowy Egrets, Black-crowned night herons, and one Cattle Egret. Most of these birds were taken to BRC when they were very young, so they had near zero experience living on their own under wild conditions. Nevertheless, some of the birds, especially the Great Egrets, bolted out of the open cages without hesitation and flew off, a little awkwardly, to nearby treetops. The Black-crowned night herons were much more cautious. The flying juvenile BCNH in today’s photo seemed timid and confused when first liberated. However, after about 30-40 minutes of experimentation, this juvenile was flying around with a confident wing beat and a top-gun attitude that shows clearly in the photo.
Today’s BONUS IMAGE shows a beautiful juvenile Red-tailed hawk flying in unusual atmospheric conditions over downtown Oakland.
NEW READER: Are you receiving Creature of the Day for the FIRST TIME? Some of you will be shocked, SCHOCKED to find this uninvited email in your inbox. Alas, this happens when I use subterfuge, misdirection, and prestidigitation to swipe email addresses from sincere but unsuspecting nature nerds. Absent any support whatsoever from actual data, I assume that the real people represented by such email addresses might not (immediately) threaten litigation, and might even enjoy getting a photo from CotD at random intervals, accompanied by my false assertions and bizarre delusional rants on a variety of topics. Should your mental health professional insist, you’ll notice that I’ve provided detailed UNSUBSCRIBE instructions below.
IS THIS GUY SMART OR WHAT? Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. -- Albert Einstein
This morning I had the opportunity to closely observe the release of several rehabilitated birds by very nice and extremely knowledgeable people from BRC, the Bird Rescue Center of Sonoma County. (https://www.birdrescuecenter.org/ ) The release took place at the edge of a quiet pond adjacent to a wastewater treatment plant near Sebastopol.
Today’s release included Great Egrets, Snowy Egrets, Black-crowned night herons, and one Cattle Egret. Most of these birds were taken to BRC when they were very young, so they had near zero experience living on their own under wild conditions. Nevertheless, some of the birds, especially the Great Egrets, bolted out of the open cages without hesitation and flew off, a little awkwardly, to nearby treetops. The Black-crowned night herons were much more cautious. The flying juvenile BCNH in today’s photo seemed timid and confused when first liberated. However, after about 30-40 minutes of experimentation, this juvenile was flying around with a confident wing beat and a top-gun attitude that shows clearly in the photo.
Today’s BONUS IMAGE shows a beautiful juvenile Red-tailed hawk flying in unusual atmospheric conditions over downtown Oakland.
NEW READER: Are you receiving Creature of the Day for the FIRST TIME? Some of you will be shocked, SCHOCKED to find this uninvited email in your inbox. Alas, this happens when I use subterfuge, misdirection, and prestidigitation to swipe email addresses from sincere but unsuspecting nature nerds. Absent any support whatsoever from actual data, I assume that the real people represented by such email addresses might not (immediately) threaten litigation, and might even enjoy getting a photo from CotD at random intervals, accompanied by my false assertions and bizarre delusional rants on a variety of topics. Should your mental health professional insist, you’ll notice that I’ve provided detailed UNSUBSCRIBE instructions below.
IS THIS GUY SMART OR WHAT? Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. -- Albert Einstein
Creature of the Day: Western Gray Squirrel + Glaucus-winged Gull (May 31, 2017)
THE WILDLIFE PHOTO BRAGGING LADDER
Meaning no DISRESPECT to squirrels (in contrast with RATS, they are one of the more charming families within the mammal order RODENTIA), but generally I’m not GLOATING when I return from a few hours of wildlife photography with a camera full of squirrel photos. Roughly equivalent in wildlife-cred with photos of crows, squirrel photos occupy the lowest rung of the wildlife photo bragging ladder.
OK, so what’s the highest rung of the ladder? A tack sharp, well exposed shot of a TWO-HEADED SNOW LEOPARD or maybe a PREGNANT ALBINO SASQUATCH would merit a position near the top. However, the truly Great Wildlife Photographer can EXTEND the bragging ladder upward with a photo of something NEVER SEEN BEFORE, perhaps a TWO-HEADED SNOW LEOPARD MATING with an ALBINO SASQUATCH. No question, that would do it. But remember (I tell myself), STATISTICS, an often misunderstood but powerfully convincing branch of mathematics, supports the near inevitability of LPEs (Low Probability Events) – after a while.
In order to soften the ODIUM and SCORN from rabid Creature of the Day readers disappointed by the squirrel photo, I’ve included a genuine piece of ART! This composition is entitled A LARGE GLAUCUS-WINGED GULL AUDITIONS FOR A NEW GODZILLA SEQUEL.
I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a completely satisfying definition of what “ART” IS , but I suspect we all understand what art DOES, or at least attempts to do. It informs, comforts, entertains, annoys, irritates, amuses, educates, illuminates, fascinates, provokes, amazes, stupefies, confuses, threatens, outrages, and sometimes only BORES its observers. MY own view: If a work provokes negative responses, it’s still ART. If it provokes no response at all, maybe it’s NOT ART.
OBVIOUSLY, a work of art is stubbornly subjective, often inducing radically disparate responses in different observers. While one might find a certain work humorous, ironic, or whimsical, another might find it offensive or disgusting. The monetary value of an artwork ranges from zero (unfortunately true for most artwork, which nobody buys, ever, at any price) to the current record of around $300 million for a single painting (PAUL GAUGUIN "Nafea faa ipoipo?”) in February, 2015. WOW. In fact, just a few days ago, a painting by Jean-Michel Basquiat sold for $110 million at A Sotheby’s auction.
NOTE: My ART is for sale. (just sayin)
Good Day,
Cheers,
Dave
Meaning no DISRESPECT to squirrels (in contrast with RATS, they are one of the more charming families within the mammal order RODENTIA), but generally I’m not GLOATING when I return from a few hours of wildlife photography with a camera full of squirrel photos. Roughly equivalent in wildlife-cred with photos of crows, squirrel photos occupy the lowest rung of the wildlife photo bragging ladder.
OK, so what’s the highest rung of the ladder? A tack sharp, well exposed shot of a TWO-HEADED SNOW LEOPARD or maybe a PREGNANT ALBINO SASQUATCH would merit a position near the top. However, the truly Great Wildlife Photographer can EXTEND the bragging ladder upward with a photo of something NEVER SEEN BEFORE, perhaps a TWO-HEADED SNOW LEOPARD MATING with an ALBINO SASQUATCH. No question, that would do it. But remember (I tell myself), STATISTICS, an often misunderstood but powerfully convincing branch of mathematics, supports the near inevitability of LPEs (Low Probability Events) – after a while.
In order to soften the ODIUM and SCORN from rabid Creature of the Day readers disappointed by the squirrel photo, I’ve included a genuine piece of ART! This composition is entitled A LARGE GLAUCUS-WINGED GULL AUDITIONS FOR A NEW GODZILLA SEQUEL.
I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a completely satisfying definition of what “ART” IS , but I suspect we all understand what art DOES, or at least attempts to do. It informs, comforts, entertains, annoys, irritates, amuses, educates, illuminates, fascinates, provokes, amazes, stupefies, confuses, threatens, outrages, and sometimes only BORES its observers. MY own view: If a work provokes negative responses, it’s still ART. If it provokes no response at all, maybe it’s NOT ART.
OBVIOUSLY, a work of art is stubbornly subjective, often inducing radically disparate responses in different observers. While one might find a certain work humorous, ironic, or whimsical, another might find it offensive or disgusting. The monetary value of an artwork ranges from zero (unfortunately true for most artwork, which nobody buys, ever, at any price) to the current record of around $300 million for a single painting (PAUL GAUGUIN "Nafea faa ipoipo?”) in February, 2015. WOW. In fact, just a few days ago, a painting by Jean-Michel Basquiat sold for $110 million at A Sotheby’s auction.
NOTE: My ART is for sale. (just sayin)
Good Day,
Cheers,
Dave
Creature of the Day: Glaucus-winged Gull (May 3, 2017)
There is a Japanese word, daikaiju, which translates approximately as “great strange beast”. This TERRIFIC WORD describes the irresistible film genre that originated in Japan in the 1950s. GODZILLA (1954) established this now classic formula, which features at least one HUGE (and often tragically misunderstood) MONSTER -- and sometimes more than one – who attack cities, especially Tokyo! Great crowds of people, trains, busses, cars, downtown skyscrapers, dams, planes, high voltage power lines, lots of heavy military hardware, and sometimes other COLOSSAL MONSTERS are spectacularly destroyed by the rampaging daikaiju.
The HONOR ROLL of daikaiju includes Godzilla (originally “Gojira”), and other eternal superstars like Mothra and Rodan.
The HONOR ROLL of daikaiju includes Godzilla (originally “Gojira”), and other eternal superstars like Mothra and Rodan.
GODZILLA movie poster, ©Toho Company Ltd. 東宝株式会社, Tōhō Kabushiki-kaisha 1954
Creature of the Day understands, admires, and salutes the revered cinematic tradition of daikaiju, but reluctantly recognizes that these amazing creatures are IMAGINARY; merely the fantastic creations of writers, directors, cinematographers, and special effects virtuosos.
IN STARK CONTRAST, Creature of the Day presents its readers with a REAL Glaucus-winged Gull in pursuit of a U.S. Coast Guard HH-65 Dolphin helicopter. Although gulls are notorious for their extremely aggressive feeding behavior, this image is surprising because the unusually intelligent gulls would normally avoid the DISCOMFORT of swallowing a helicopter with a main 5-blade rotor diameter of just over 39 feet.
Creature of the Day understands, admires, and salutes the revered cinematic tradition of daikaiju, but reluctantly recognizes that these amazing creatures are IMAGINARY; merely the fantastic creations of writers, directors, cinematographers, and special effects virtuosos.
IN STARK CONTRAST, Creature of the Day presents its readers with a REAL Glaucus-winged Gull in pursuit of a U.S. Coast Guard HH-65 Dolphin helicopter. Although gulls are notorious for their extremely aggressive feeding behavior, this image is surprising because the unusually intelligent gulls would normally avoid the DISCOMFORT of swallowing a helicopter with a main 5-blade rotor diameter of just over 39 feet.
Creature of the Day: Harbor Seal (April 19, 2017)
Seals and Sea Lions are members of a group (clade) known as PINNIPEDS. Around San Francisco Bay and in nearby ocean waters, careful observers are likely to see both Seals and Sea Lions. Dear readers, SURELY YOU ALL REMEMBER that Creature of the Day (obsessively committed to its educational mission) PATIENTLY EXPLAINED some characteristics to help differentiate Seals and Sea Lions -- barely sixteen months ago! For those readers who remember the two easily observed physical differences that are diagnostic, please proceed to the paragraph marked GOLD STAR IN YOUR PERMANENT RECORD. For those who do not remember, please proceed directly to the paragraph marked PROBATION.
PROBATION: From Creature of the Day, December 30, 2015: “The group that includes all of the seals and sea lions is the PINNIPEDS. Sea Lions are the ones that can balance beach balls on their noses and hang out at Pier 39 in San Francisco, posing for tourists’ iPhone pics. They’re the ones that “perform” in grotesque shows at places like SeaWorld. They can clap their large flippers together and “walk”. Sea Lions are usually black and have external ear flaps. Seals (aka “true seals” or Phocids) don’t have visible external ears, and have much smaller flippers. They can’t “walk” like sea lions. Around here, we usually see two kinds of seals -- Harbor Seals and Elephant Seals.” http://www.dscomposition.com/creature-of-the-day-2015.html
GOLD STAR IN YOUR PERMANENT RECORD: Today’s creature is a Harbor Seal. He was one of 5 young males relaxing on a quiet beach a few hundred yards from the Chimney Rock parking area at Point Reyes N.S. Harbor Seals are much smaller than Elephant Seals, who often show up on the same Pt. Reyes beaches. Harbor Seals eat mostly fish, and sometimes birds -- especially ducks -- as well as crab, shrimp, mollusks, and squid.
PROBATION: From Creature of the Day, December 30, 2015: “The group that includes all of the seals and sea lions is the PINNIPEDS. Sea Lions are the ones that can balance beach balls on their noses and hang out at Pier 39 in San Francisco, posing for tourists’ iPhone pics. They’re the ones that “perform” in grotesque shows at places like SeaWorld. They can clap their large flippers together and “walk”. Sea Lions are usually black and have external ear flaps. Seals (aka “true seals” or Phocids) don’t have visible external ears, and have much smaller flippers. They can’t “walk” like sea lions. Around here, we usually see two kinds of seals -- Harbor Seals and Elephant Seals.” http://www.dscomposition.com/creature-of-the-day-2015.html
GOLD STAR IN YOUR PERMANENT RECORD: Today’s creature is a Harbor Seal. He was one of 5 young males relaxing on a quiet beach a few hundred yards from the Chimney Rock parking area at Point Reyes N.S. Harbor Seals are much smaller than Elephant Seals, who often show up on the same Pt. Reyes beaches. Harbor Seals eat mostly fish, and sometimes birds -- especially ducks -- as well as crab, shrimp, mollusks, and squid.
Creature of the Day: Red-tailed Hawk (April 11, 2017)
These birds are Red-tailed Hawks. “OK, but I don’t see any RED TAILS, Dave!” observes a Creature of the Day subscriber with a decisive, commanding KGO(1). THANK YOU for your careful attention to detail, Anonymous Subscriber. The hawks don’t have red tails because they are juvenile Red-tailed Hawks. The brick-red color of the tail feathers doesn’t appear until the birds reach adulthood.
AND NOW, TODAY’S VERY BRIEF RANT: Speaking of flight, what’s up with window seat airline passengers CLOSING WINDOW SHADES when the views out the windows are STUNNING? Even when flying over or through the most awesome wonders, (Aurora Borealis, the Grand Canyon, pyrotechnic lightning storms, explicit xxx-rated cloud formations, near-miss flybys of stealth technology military aircraft) the PAD(2)-infected seatmate draws down the shade in order to protect the viewing quality of SACRED iPhone or iPad images of who-knows-what. An old Yiddish saying comes to mind: May all your teeth fall out except one, so you can still have a toothache.
Cheers,
Dave
FOOTNOTES:
AND NOW, TODAY’S VERY BRIEF RANT: Speaking of flight, what’s up with window seat airline passengers CLOSING WINDOW SHADES when the views out the windows are STUNNING? Even when flying over or through the most awesome wonders, (Aurora Borealis, the Grand Canyon, pyrotechnic lightning storms, explicit xxx-rated cloud formations, near-miss flybys of stealth technology military aircraft) the PAD(2)-infected seatmate draws down the shade in order to protect the viewing quality of SACRED iPhone or iPad images of who-knows-what. An old Yiddish saying comes to mind: May all your teeth fall out except one, so you can still have a toothache.
Cheers,
Dave
FOOTNOTES:
- Keen Grasp of the Obvious
- Postmodern Attention Disorder
Creature of the Day: Turkey Vulture (March 25, 2017)
Today’s photo features a handsome, curious, and keenly observant Turkey Vulture. Although this very large, common carrion feeder gets no respect(1) from poorly informed observers, it’s a majestic high flier that performs a valuable service, i.e., cleaning up the remains of dead animals by… eating them. This LOVELY BIRD’s scientific name, Cathartes aura, along with its family name Cathartidae (New World Vultures) sound familiar don’t they? RIGHT; like the word CATHARSIS, all of these words come from the same Greek root, meaning “cleanse or purify”, an unquestionably NOBLE undertaking(2).
It's easy to predict that SOME SUSPICIOUS READERS will intimate that today’s photo is not 100% NATURAL, and that it has been manipulated or modified in some way, perhaps through the nefarious use of Photoshop or other photo editing software. That’s ridiculous; it’s FAKE NEWS.
Best regards,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
It's easy to predict that SOME SUSPICIOUS READERS will intimate that today’s photo is not 100% NATURAL, and that it has been manipulated or modified in some way, perhaps through the nefarious use of Photoshop or other photo editing software. That’s ridiculous; it’s FAKE NEWS.
Best regards,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
- Does this suggest a reference to the catchphrase “I don’t get no respect” and the inimitable Rodney Dangerfield? Perhaps, but while lesser newsletter authors may have been tempted to refer to Turkey Vultures as “the Rodney Dangerfield of Raptors”, please appreciate that the ERUDITE SOPHISTICATION of the editors of Creature of the Day spared you from such vulgar condescension. Please accrue 10 points in your PERMANENT RECORD if you knew that Rodney D’s real name was Jacob Cohen.
- UNDERTAKING. Hello! It’s a pun. Get it?
Creature of the Day: Red-winged Blackbird (March 09, 2017)
On the recommendation of Creature of the Day cultist reader Jane M, early this morning I walked the underappreciated Tomales Bay Trail(1). Wrapped in thick fog and pleasant silence, I had the muddy trail to myself, except for a few dozen pure black dairy cows with bright yellow ear tags(2). Jane had recently seen Bald Eagles(3) there, and I hoped to get some photos of them doing some of the amazing things eagles do. During the two hours I wandered around, I saw Canada geese, assorted ducks, Spotted Towhees (pretty birds with RED eyes), Western Scrub Jays, sparrows, crows, ravens, gulls, Great Blue Herons, Great Egrets, Red-winged Blackbirds – but no eagles.
So, today’s primary photo shows a male Red-winged Blackbird transforming himself from an ordinary little black bird into a macho, big-shouldered superbird with a King Kong attitude, displaying his puffed-up beautiful red epaulets and singing robustly to attract females (usually several, sometimes as many as ten(4)) to his excellent territory on a pretty stock pond near the shore of Tomales Bay.
I don’t know if Bald Eagles have egos, but if they do, those egos would probably be BIG. The image of a Bald Eagle is one of the primary symbols of the UNITED STATES of AMERICA, no less, so we see it on our money, our mail boxes, official seals of assorted government agencies – including (big brass fanfare…) the PRESIDENTIAL SEAL. Golly.
So, today’s primary photo shows a male Red-winged Blackbird transforming himself from an ordinary little black bird into a macho, big-shouldered superbird with a King Kong attitude, displaying his puffed-up beautiful red epaulets and singing robustly to attract females (usually several, sometimes as many as ten(4)) to his excellent territory on a pretty stock pond near the shore of Tomales Bay.
I don’t know if Bald Eagles have egos, but if they do, those egos would probably be BIG. The image of a Bald Eagle is one of the primary symbols of the UNITED STATES of AMERICA, no less, so we see it on our money, our mail boxes, official seals of assorted government agencies – including (big brass fanfare…) the PRESIDENTIAL SEAL. Golly.
INEVITABLY, the PRESIDENTIAL SEAL reminds us of the AUGUST, SOLEMN, and IMMENSE PRESTIGE of the US presidency.
Good Evening,
Best Regards,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
Hey, one of my pictures is in the newspaper! http://ee2.uniondemocrat.com/doc/uniondemocrat-weekender/weekender-030917/2017030901/#8
(see caption on page 9)
Best Regards,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
- Tomales Bay Trail, near Point Reyes Station, is not the same as Tomales Point Trail, a much longer route starting at Pierce Point Ranch and ending at Tomales Point.
- Cow #542 seemed to like something subtle and sympathetic about me. It’s true: I CAN produce convincing moo-calls on pitch. Hey - I was flattered (who wouldn’t be), but otherwise not seriously interested in further interaction with #542.
- In this case, “BALD” refers to early English usage and means WHITE-HEADED, not HAIRLESS/FEATHERLESS. Check the OED if you don’t believe me. See. Told you so.
- Red-winged Blackbird males often defend a ‘harem’ of up to 10 females. Each female builds her own nest. The females often mange to copulate with males other than their “mates” and lay clutches of mixed paternity. It’s quite a party out there.
Hey, one of my pictures is in the newspaper! http://ee2.uniondemocrat.com/doc/uniondemocrat-weekender/weekender-030917/2017030901/#8
(see caption on page 9)
Creature of the Day: Common Raven (February 22, 2017)
Many people who “love nature” are unhappy with the win-lose finality of PREDATION(1), which has been a fact of life on earth for at least a BILLION years(2). So, let’s do ourselves a favor and use GENTLER terminology: RECYCLING! PREDATION is really just RECYCLING that starts a little bit early!
Today’s photo shows a Common Raven with the head of a California Gull in its bill. Is this PREDATION? Maybe. When I arrived at the scene (sand dunes near Abbott’s Lagoon) the gull was already dead and the raven was enthusiastically consuming it. Although a Common Raven and a California Gull appear to be about the same size, a raven weighs twice as much! Ravens have been observed taking live pigeons and even nestling Great Blue Herons. But ravens are also frequent carrion consumers. The most likely explanation: The raven had discovered a dead gull and was RECYCLING it.
WITH MY APOLOGIES, there will be NO RANT TODAY. Instead: ART TALK
About twice a week I spend an hour or two online, clicking around gallery websites, Instagram, and other online sources of visual art to steal ideas get inspiration from photographers, painters, printmakers, sculptors, etc. This cyber-wandering exposes me to ARTIST’S STATEMENTS. Sometimes they’re very blunt, beginning with a few BOLD keywords that clearly establish intent and require little further explanation. One said only “Radical Feminist Lesbian Jewish Warrior”. Succinct. Cogent. Comprehensive. Why dilute it? But sometimes the artist takes the opposite approach. Here’s a REAL sentence from another Artist’s Statement (please read it out loud): “In what I can only call a hard-won state of grace, I work to frame momentary collisions of light and matter into visual paragraphs of reverence.” GOSH.
OK, this motivates me to get going on some ART TALK of my own. Stay tuned.
Cheers,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
NEWS FLASH, FREE WINE & CRACKERS!!
I have 4 images in a photography exhibition “InFocus 2017” in Sonora/Columbia, CA details here: http://www.infocus-tcaa.org/ March 5-March 19, RECEPTION on March 5th
and
I have 1 image in another exhibition “New Visions”, from April 7-May 14, at the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art, RECEPTION on April 7th
Today’s photo shows a Common Raven with the head of a California Gull in its bill. Is this PREDATION? Maybe. When I arrived at the scene (sand dunes near Abbott’s Lagoon) the gull was already dead and the raven was enthusiastically consuming it. Although a Common Raven and a California Gull appear to be about the same size, a raven weighs twice as much! Ravens have been observed taking live pigeons and even nestling Great Blue Herons. But ravens are also frequent carrion consumers. The most likely explanation: The raven had discovered a dead gull and was RECYCLING it.
WITH MY APOLOGIES, there will be NO RANT TODAY. Instead: ART TALK
About twice a week I spend an hour or two online, clicking around gallery websites, Instagram, and other online sources of visual art to steal ideas get inspiration from photographers, painters, printmakers, sculptors, etc. This cyber-wandering exposes me to ARTIST’S STATEMENTS. Sometimes they’re very blunt, beginning with a few BOLD keywords that clearly establish intent and require little further explanation. One said only “Radical Feminist Lesbian Jewish Warrior”. Succinct. Cogent. Comprehensive. Why dilute it? But sometimes the artist takes the opposite approach. Here’s a REAL sentence from another Artist’s Statement (please read it out loud): “In what I can only call a hard-won state of grace, I work to frame momentary collisions of light and matter into visual paragraphs of reverence.” GOSH.
OK, this motivates me to get going on some ART TALK of my own. Stay tuned.
Cheers,
Dave
FOOTNOTES
- especially if the prey is a baby Harp Seal (i.e., cute), but no worries if it’s a rat, a leech, or a mosquito.
- Try to wrap your mind around a BILLION years. Here’s one approach. Let’s say you look out your window on a rainy day and see a tiny rivulet of water sliding down a very gentle slope. It erodes a little groove in the dirt, but the dirt is very hard, mostly rock, and only erodes 1 millimeter per year. At this rate, it would take 25 years to carve a rut about an inch deep. I mean, that’s SLOW. How deep would it be in 100 years? 100 millimeters, or about 4 inches. OK, so, how long would it take to carve a canyon as deep as the Grand Canyon? Wikipedia says the Grand Canyon is 6,093 feet or 1,857 meters at its deepest, so that’s 1,857,000 millimeters, about 1.857 million years. How deep would it be in a BILLION years? EASY! A BILLION millimeters! A billion millimeters is 1000 kilometers, or about 620 miles deep. One BILLION. Got it?
NEWS FLASH, FREE WINE & CRACKERS!!
I have 4 images in a photography exhibition “InFocus 2017” in Sonora/Columbia, CA details here: http://www.infocus-tcaa.org/ March 5-March 19, RECEPTION on March 5th
and
I have 1 image in another exhibition “New Visions”, from April 7-May 14, at the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art, RECEPTION on April 7th
Creature of the Day: Osprey and Modern Human (February 06, 2017)
SPRING is coming. Look closely; Photo #1 shows a female Osprey with nest material in her left talons. We’ll be seeing birds and other creatures begin nest building very soon.
For the first time, we’re delighted to feature a modern human, Homo sapiens, as CotD Photo #2. We recently photographed this charming, handsome, and charismatic 4-month-old human in our Oakland studio. Absent any clear SIGNALS of RESISTANCE from baby Max, and recognizing his obvious intelligence and discerning preferences, we boldly enrolled him as a lifetime CotD subscriber. CAREFULLY NOTING that his parents and grandparents are also members of the cult subscribers, we hereby SMUGLY proclaim our first three generation Creature of the Day family. Booyah.
Max reminds us that THE FUTURE is coming, and how important it is to DEFEND & PROMOTE democracy, justice, diversity, kindness, fairness, education, humor, reason, science, privacy, compassion, human rights, optimism, decency, altruism, GOOD TASTE, and, in a world now gagging on #alternativefacts, TRUTH.
Always a THOUGHT LEADER, Creature of the Day leveraged the power of #alternativefacts long before Kellyanne Conway(1) engendered the hashtag. However, our goal is to entertain and puzzle our DEAR READERS, not to bully and enslave them.
Without further comment on the POWER of ART, check this out: https://magazin.spiegel.de/SP/2017/6/?utm_source=spon&utm_campaign=heftkastenprint
FYI: Der Spiegel (“The Mirror”), published in German and English, is one of Europe’s largest and most influential weekly news magazines.
FOOTNOTES
For the first time, we’re delighted to feature a modern human, Homo sapiens, as CotD Photo #2. We recently photographed this charming, handsome, and charismatic 4-month-old human in our Oakland studio. Absent any clear SIGNALS of RESISTANCE from baby Max, and recognizing his obvious intelligence and discerning preferences, we boldly enrolled him as a lifetime CotD subscriber. CAREFULLY NOTING that his parents and grandparents are also members of the cult subscribers, we hereby SMUGLY proclaim our first three generation Creature of the Day family. Booyah.
Max reminds us that THE FUTURE is coming, and how important it is to DEFEND & PROMOTE democracy, justice, diversity, kindness, fairness, education, humor, reason, science, privacy, compassion, human rights, optimism, decency, altruism, GOOD TASTE, and, in a world now gagging on #alternativefacts, TRUTH.
Always a THOUGHT LEADER, Creature of the Day leveraged the power of #alternativefacts long before Kellyanne Conway(1) engendered the hashtag. However, our goal is to entertain and puzzle our DEAR READERS, not to bully and enslave them.
Without further comment on the POWER of ART, check this out: https://magazin.spiegel.de/SP/2017/6/?utm_source=spon&utm_campaign=heftkastenprint
FYI: Der Spiegel (“The Mirror”), published in German and English, is one of Europe’s largest and most influential weekly news magazines.
FOOTNOTES
- We reluctantly acknowledge an impressive fluidity in Kellyanne Conway’s logorrhea.
Creature of the Day: Merlin & White-tailed Kite (January 16, 2017)
Here at Creature of the Day, we insist on OBSERVATION, MEASUREMENT, REPEATABLE EXPERIMENTATION, and RIGOROUS STATISTICAL ANALYSIS to answer important scientific questions. We categorically reject flimsy assertions, diaphanous superstitions, new age mumbo-jumbo, and crackpot theories as unworthy of our attention. We respect and practice REASON. HOWEVER, this week I saw two quite uncommon and charismatic raptors within 5 minutes of each other. My friends, it was FRIDAY, the 13th! Chilling. Unexplainable. Bizarre. And I thought Friday the 13th was supposed to bring BAD luck.
Photo #1 shows a Merlin with prey in its talons. Look closely and you’ll see downy feathers stuck to the Merlin’s bill. The prey is almost certainly a Least Sandpiper (based on prey size, shape, and yellow legs). Merlins, like other falcons, are fierce predators. They hunt small songbirds, shorebirds, and dragonflies. Photo #2 shows a White-tailed Kite, which I spotted about 50 yards from the Merlin. Note the beautiful red-orange eyes. I’ve never before reported a Kite in CotD. In both cases, the rising sun was right behind me, exactly where it had to be in order for the birds to be well lit for their CotD photographs. Like I said, it was FRIDAY, the 13th.
We have some new subscribers, so it’s a good time to review some of the Creature of the Day procedures, traditions, advisories, and requirements. Although Creature of the Day has variously been compared with:
political parties,
religions,
roving bands of scary clowns,
street gangs,
Sicilian crime families,
soccer hooligans,
rapture cults,
Paleolithic tribes,
and, most aptly, radical poetry collectives,
we are really just a friendly and diverse assembly of SEEKERS who cherish TRUTH, BEAUTY, and RANDOM FACTOIDS. We enjoy pretty pictures of animals, and endeavor diligently to answer some of life’s most puzzling questions. For example, “Is KALE a vegetable in the cabbage family or a type of industrial paper, useful for roofing?”
Let’s review a few fundamentals about CotD for our new subscriber brothers and sisters:
Good Day and Best Regards,
Dave
Photo #1 shows a Merlin with prey in its talons. Look closely and you’ll see downy feathers stuck to the Merlin’s bill. The prey is almost certainly a Least Sandpiper (based on prey size, shape, and yellow legs). Merlins, like other falcons, are fierce predators. They hunt small songbirds, shorebirds, and dragonflies. Photo #2 shows a White-tailed Kite, which I spotted about 50 yards from the Merlin. Note the beautiful red-orange eyes. I’ve never before reported a Kite in CotD. In both cases, the rising sun was right behind me, exactly where it had to be in order for the birds to be well lit for their CotD photographs. Like I said, it was FRIDAY, the 13th.
We have some new subscribers, so it’s a good time to review some of the Creature of the Day procedures, traditions, advisories, and requirements. Although Creature of the Day has variously been compared with:
political parties,
religions,
roving bands of scary clowns,
street gangs,
Sicilian crime families,
soccer hooligans,
rapture cults,
Paleolithic tribes,
and, most aptly, radical poetry collectives,
we are really just a friendly and diverse assembly of SEEKERS who cherish TRUTH, BEAUTY, and RANDOM FACTOIDS. We enjoy pretty pictures of animals, and endeavor diligently to answer some of life’s most puzzling questions. For example, “Is KALE a vegetable in the cabbage family or a type of industrial paper, useful for roofing?”
Let’s review a few fundamentals about CotD for our new subscriber brothers and sisters:
- Creature of the Day, when combined with alcohol, cannabis, or ripe persimmon, can be addictive, but it is 100% Gluten Free, Kosher for Passover, Free-Range, Fair Trade, and non-carcinogenic.
- Creature of the Day may provoke unusual reactions in some readers, including giddiness, speaking in tongues, somnambulism, spontaneous orgasm, and levitation.
- Creature of the Day should only be read by “sensitive” people in a well-padded, supervised setting, preferably with restraints gently, but strictly employed.
- Creature of the Day vigorously encourages WRITTEN COMMENTS in response to our publications, but only if such comments are obsequious, treacly, and decisively flattering to the reporters, editors, and especially the publisher of Creature of the Day. Just click “REPLY” and tell us what you think!
- New subscribers serve a 6-month probationary period during which their reactions to CotD are closely monitored by a team of “experts” who wear white lab coats and horn-rimmed glasses. All the extremely personal information we collect is strictly confidential, except we sell it to Google, Facebook, and NSA -- who assure us it will be used only for selling us pharmaceuticals.
- PRECOCIOUS CHILDREN are encouraged to read CotD, and to report their parents’ suspicious or unusual activities to their CotD minders.
Good Day and Best Regards,
Dave
Creature of the Day: Ring-billed Gull (January 5, 2017)
Ring-billed Gulls are common in the Bay Area during fall and winter. I’m sorry, but that’s really all I have to say. There will be absolutely no RANT today.
Except I heard TERRY GROSS, someone I extravagantly admire as a true polymath and Renaissance Woman, commit a wrong-word mistake on Fresh Air! O. M. G.
“Noooooooooo”, I screamed in profound anguish. Et tu, Terry? I was shocked. I was distraught. I was hysterical. I think I must have blacked out. The incredibly well-informed, erudite Terry used the word “flaunt” when she should have used “flout”. She was interviewing someone forgettable, and made the common-but-egregious mistake of using “flaunt” when intending to convey the idea of contempt or scorn for a law by disobeying it flagrantly. My friends, that word is “flout”. If this misuse of “flaunt” makes YOUR BLOOD LITERALLY(1) BOIL, then you’ll find comfort at Creature of the Day, your safest refuge in a world of linguistic decay.
THANK YOU for your kind attention. Good Day.
FOOTNOTES
Except I heard TERRY GROSS, someone I extravagantly admire as a true polymath and Renaissance Woman, commit a wrong-word mistake on Fresh Air! O. M. G.
“Noooooooooo”, I screamed in profound anguish. Et tu, Terry? I was shocked. I was distraught. I was hysterical. I think I must have blacked out. The incredibly well-informed, erudite Terry used the word “flaunt” when she should have used “flout”. She was interviewing someone forgettable, and made the common-but-egregious mistake of using “flaunt” when intending to convey the idea of contempt or scorn for a law by disobeying it flagrantly. My friends, that word is “flout”. If this misuse of “flaunt” makes YOUR BLOOD LITERALLY(1) BOIL, then you’ll find comfort at Creature of the Day, your safest refuge in a world of linguistic decay.
THANK YOU for your kind attention. Good Day.
FOOTNOTES
- Dear Readers: As the more coherent members of our community no doubt recall, we explored the cruel abuse of the word “LITERALLY” in the CotD episode of May 4, 2016. Scroll down: http://www.dscomposition.com/creature-of-the-day.html